What Is In These Words That We Say?

June 17, 2008

What to say, What to say? I am not really sure what to say. It has been a few days since I posted...sorry. I don't think that 5 have stopped since I got here. I have taken like 500 pictures that and have been trying to upload them for 3 days. Things seem to take a lot longer here than anywhere else. People here seem not to have a sense of time and a sense that things need to be done at a certain time and they have to be to a place at a certain time. It is weird but it is ok to show up 2 or 3 hours late and to knock on your door in the middle of dinner. People don't seem to understand that there are certain hours that knocking on your gate at eight at night is not an ok thing to do. Another thing is that they seem to think that it is not a problem to show up to class. Its like why should I do that? Ummm, because you need to come and learn that its not ok to just leave your baby in the crib you have to play with it, its not ok to give your baby things that it your mind are ok for the baby when in truth they can kill your baby, its not ok that you don't come to meet Korin and get to DASH to get your AIDS meds, its not ok that you don't know what color red is (THAT IS WHY YOU ARE IN LITERACY!). No one here seems to be aware of things that are not ok...well what is not ok in my mind may be perfectly ok in their minds. And it is not ok for the ladies with AIDS to have the mind set that they are going to die because they have AIDS. 3 out of 20 women in our programs have AIDS. They think that they are going to die and that there babies are going to die. Not true. If they come to us, to go to DASH (where they get there meds), get there meds when they need to and take care of themselves, they can live long and normal lives. But it is such a taboo here to have AIDS that the ladies will not admit that they have it, even though in the back of their minds they know they do.They just won't admit it. 

I still am not sure how I can run around like a chicken with its head cut off all day and deal with all of this all day and still want to be here. But its like that line from OneRepublic called Stop and Stare, then one that goes "You start to wonder why your here not there". When I hear that I think well, why am I not in Haiti? There are normally a number of reasons but I always want to be here even though it is so hard. I love it here, I really do.