I think that I am beginning to get this whole Gideon thing, I think. I could be be way out in left field somewhere but I have a good feeling about this. I have read and re-read Judges chapters six through eight. I have come to the conclusion that something is going on with me. I almost completely (probably completely) identify with Gideon.In chapter six verse thirteen it says "Gideon says to Him 'O my lord, if the Lord is with us, why then has all this happened to us? And where are all His miracles which our fathers told us about, saying 'Did not the Lord bring us up from Egypt?' But now the Lord has forsaken us and delivered us into the hands of the Midianites.'" I am constantly asking God where he is and maybe he would like to fill me in on some of the things that he is doing at some point. I constantly think well Lord, if aall of this happened why can't you do this one little thing for me? HELLO?? Needless to say He doesn't answer me when we talk like that. Our conversations seem to be a little one sided some times. I do a lot of the talking. I think that He is just waiting for me to get it all out and then we'll come back to it. Just go ahead and vent and get it all out Alyssa and then we can talk. Maybe He was doing the same thing with Gideon when he didn't answer him when he asked the Lord where he had been. He just kinda looks at him.
It contiunes in verse 25 saying that the Lord tells Gideon to take his fathers second best bull and to pull down the altar to Baal then to rebuild an altar to God in its place. But then use the remains of the altar to Baal to feed the fire for the offering to God. "Ummm...excuse me God but ummm...about that...I can do all that uh but let me go and get about ten people or so to help me with that and the I think that I might take a nap and when I get up and make sure that it is dark outside and then we'll get on that..." Well I more or less think that is how it went. And that is what would have been said if God had appeared to me and asked me to do that. I am not to big on doing things on my own. I like to do things with other people. I like them to help me. But God didn't tell Gideon to go get ten people to help him. God told him to go and tear down the idol on his own. Not gonna lie but, I like my life and I would have done the same exact thing as Gideon did. There is no way I would have gone by myself and torn down an idol that maybe a couple hundred people worship at. There would have been Alyssa for dinner. But if you have ten other people, there are people to back you up in that you did and you can keep on living. God has called me to a country that not many people are called to. No one and I mean no one want s to live in Haiti. You might think that you do but once you get there and are there for a little while, you might not think that this was such a good idea anymore. The electricity only works...well not even half the time more like a forth or the time...maybe not even that. No one really wants to live there. But if you know me you know that I really truly want to. And that is totally a God thing. But if that is where I am supposed to be, I have to be willing to do things on my own and go alone. I have to learn how to lead and to rely on God always. I can not always rely on others to be there with me. Not everyone is cut out to live in Haiti or to even go to Haiti (I am not saying don't go if you want to I am just saying pary...A LOT). I realize now that might be the only one that is called to what I am supposed to do. You think that I sould get that already...I am the obly one that can do what God has called me to do, not the ten people that I want to come with me. I have just now really come to the realization. I have been called to do all of these things that I talk and think about not my friends.
Gideon went on to be a great leader. He defeated the Midianites and there was peace under his forty yeah reign. Maybe I can do that but I think that I'll just stick to Haiti...
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